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Trump Expands Attacks To Include George Clinton

Source: SXMIslandTime 12 Oct 2016 04:56 PM

YOUNGSTOWN, Ohio - Unveiling a strategy that some Republican insiders deemed unwise, Donald Trump on Tuesday unleashed a blistering attack on George Clinton.

In a furious tirade at a rally in Youngstown, Ohio, the Republican Presidential nominee seemed to take his audience by surprise by tearing into Clinton, the founder of the legendary funk ensembles known collectively as Parliament-Funkadelic.

“Anyone who is knocking me for my locker-room banter has never heard ‘Atomic Dog,’ â€ Trump told his audience. “It’s disgusting.”

“If I went around saying, ‘Why must I feel like that, why must I chase the cat, it’s the dog in me,’ the media would kill me,” he added. 

As many members of his audience shifted uncomfortably in their seats, Trump escalated his attack on Clinton by impugning the musician’s most celebrated asset: his funk.

“George Clinton says he has funk, but he has terrible funk,” he said. “I have better funk than he does.”

The billionaire continued his attacks later on Twitter, where he referred repeatedly to Clinton as “Unfunky George.”

On Capitol Hill, House Speaker Paul Ryan bemoaned the latest tactics of his party’s mercurial nominee. “At a time when he should be talking about jobs and terrorism, he’s saying, ‘Do the dogcatcher, baby, do the dogcatcher,’ â€ Ryan said. “It’s counterproductive.”

Andy Borowitz is a New York Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes the Borowitz Report for newyorker.com.
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